Damn XCite!

Oh, I'm so mad at XCite! Well, maybe it's not their fault? Don't know...

But first let me tell about last wednesday. - I was out with Rammy and my angel Andrej. Somehow we decided to go as tiger-daddy (Rammy) and his two tiger-cubs (Andrej & me). And I have to say: I LOVE my tiger-outfit! Always wanted to be a tiger. It's my totem, I guess...
But I wasn't too happy that day, cause I felt bad that Andrej bought his tiger-skin for a lot of money just to please me. Mine was for free (well, I added a flexible tail and ears now, which were some Lindens, but not too many). I felt bad, that he did that, so I decided to buy him a nice XCite-collar for the outfit. And.... that damn thing didn't appear in my inventory. I spent hours and hours searching and waiting for it, but it didn't come. Well, I have to say, it maybe was a problem of Linden-lag, not of XCite, so I can't actually blame them... and after I wrote them an IM the next day, they sent me the collar. Strange enough: It was already rezzed (opened)!?
The rest of the night we strolled around, went to a dance at the Yaoi-night-club, then to the tristar-dungeon, where we performed a good show. And we learned to know Dougg, a cute little kitten with a very hard life. I adopted him, so we have a house-pet now. I always wanted a kitten, but I never thought, it would be a Neko...
On this picture you see me as tiger, Rammy relaxing in the background, and with me on the rug little kitten Dougg. Such a cutie! *sigh* But he wasn't XCited, so I bought the beginners-package for him. Maybe it's a little stupid, to spend so much money for a homeless kitten I knew just for a few days, but I felt sorry for him and his hard life, and I wanted to cheer him up. And it was some kind of selfish too, cause now I can play with him much better!

The rest of the week I was busy with the house. I wasn't happy with the way it was build. So I rebuilt the whole house. And I'm not finished yet! It's a lot of work and I'm interrupted way too often.

We have some new pledges too. So it is time to get ready. But I'm a little concerned about the prims. We still don't have enough. Well.... have to wait till I'm ready, so we'll see!

I walked around a lot as tiger. Did I mention, that I LOVE it? So to make it perfect I wanted to buy fangs. Went to XCite and.... again!!! I paid the money and didn't get anything back. I waited for over an hour to receive the objects, but nothing. Nada! Niente! Nichts!
Oh, I'm soooo angry about XCite! I counted: Spent almost 12.000 Lindens on XCite!-products in the last two months. I have to write them another IM. That's annoying. I think, it was the last time ever, I bought something online. If I ever buy an XCite!-Product again, I'll better go straight to the shop and not order it online.

However... last night I strolled around with Rammy, Andrej and pyrate - a new pledge. We found an interesting dungeon with some nice instruments, but it was a little weird and strange. That pyrate doesn't know much about RP. And he's kind of arrogant. I'm not sure, if we should keep him as pledge. But he had some good ideas for hazing... Well, we'll see!
And Andrej acted a little strange several times. I wasn't sure what's going on with him. He suddenly left us. Later I visited him at his home and he told me, that the tiger-stuff isn't the right thing for him. He just did it to please me! I felt honored and bad the same time.
Well, I enjoyed having a tiger-cub-brother and a tiger-cub-daddy, but if he doesn't feel good with it, he shouldn't do it. Too bad, but I don't want him to get b-/sad mood.

Oh, and Andrej donated a shaving-table for the bathroom. Fabulous! Of course we had to try it immediately, so Rammy and me shaved Andrej and Jeremy. We had lots of fun with it!

still busy

Here I am again! - Lots of things to do the last week.

But let me tell you first of all: Everything's okay with Rammy now. I'm so happy with it.

And Andrej.... *sigh*.... he's such a sweetie! Too bad he don't have much time. Always on duty... But today we got 11 hours. And we will use them!!!

But the main reason, I was busy: I rented land! Two parcels with 1024 sqm each. And I built the big house I've always wanted! But it's really a lot of work. And always the problem with the prims... They are gone much too fast.
I'm really proud of what I did with the two parcels. I think it looks nice after the work I've done. It was an ugly mess before I started. I just wish I had more prims, so I could do more decoration. Don't know how others manage that!? And my inventory.... Oh gosh! .... It's a mess! I don't know when I will get ready with all that stuff?

But first of all I'm looking forward to meet Andrej in a few hours...

Happy Valentine?

It's Valentines Day... so what?! I started it sad... and angry... and sad... and upset... and did I mention sadness?

Had some kind of fight with Rammy last night. - Oh, I should tell you: I bought some new XCite-stuff the day before yesterday. And somehow I screwed it up. Don't know what happened, but some strange thing attached on my cock and I couldn't use it any more. Can you imagine how depressing and desperating it is, to not be able to use your cock??? Especially when you got a cutie like Andrej around?
So, I wasn't in a good mood at all as Rammy arrived. I tried to fix the problem (and I managed it) while Rammy waited patiently. As I finally finished I gave him a cock-ring as a gift for his patience. And then it happened...

I don't know WHY he'd chosen "give back to owner" at all instead of just "take" the object... however, he accidently deleted the house! - - - Do you remember Jeremy doing the same two weeks ago? And how mad Rammy was at him?

Soooooooooo..... I have to admit: I laughed my heart out! You should have seen Rammys face! And I couldn't help it. I had to laugh and laugh and laugh... Of course he became more and more upset. But he acted as if it was MY fault, that HE deleted the house. Hello?!?

I just don't know why he was so mad at all!? After all it was ME who was busy with furnishing and building in the last two weeks. I can't remember that he worked anything on the house. I don't blame him for that... I just want to say: IF anyone had a reason to become mad, then ME.

But it tried to see the chance: I thought it's just a heavenly sign that it's time to fish or cut bait! So I started a discussion about our plans of renting our own land. I'm just tired of temporary solutions and compromises! And Rammy seemed to see it the same way... Till he said - after 2 hours of discussion - that for the moment we should rebuild the house and start from the beginning.

ARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I told him, that I am too tired for this. Again it would be ME who had to do all the work. And no, Sir! I won't do it again!!! (Well, I have to admit: Today the house was back and I started again... couldn't help it!) Well, he said he's tired too and will go to bed. He gave me a short hug and vanished. Left me alone with all the anger and desperation. And Andrej left too.

I felt so alone... and sad... and angry at Rammy at the same time. This damn frathouse will NEVER work. So either I forget it or I will do (and pay) it all by myself. Maybe that's the best way?

I couldn't get sleep, so I strolled around. Went to college and almost startet a fight with Quirt. Hm, I think, he was a little scared of me... Good!

Then I did some work-out and katas to blow off steam. Didn't really help, but felt good. I ended at the pool of Andrejs apartment-house. I'm not sure, why I went there!? He offered me a few hours ago, that I could use the house as a kind of sanctuary. But I didn't want to go inside, so I just hang around at the pool. I phoned with Anaru, told him the whole story. And he soothed me that Rammy and me will find a way to reconcile, cause we are inseperable. I hope he's right! *snif*

I wrote Valentine's cards to Rammy and Andrej. And now I'm waiting for a reaction...

Time for an update

Brotherhood of the Liberating Light

Yes! I've been busy.

I told you, that finally we created the "Fratboyz spanking and hazing" group and rented a house. We call the fraternity "Brotherhood of the Liberating Light" - Rammy's idea. Sounds wonderful! Mystically somehow...

But the frathouse takes up too much time. It's too small and we don't have much prims. I would like to do much more furnishing and make it cosy, but I don't feel "at home" at all.

We are at a point for change, but I don't know the direction... Rammy didn't do much in the house. That's okay. I know he's busy. But it's exhausting for me to care for the house and for two pledges.

So, the question is: How will we go on? We could buy or rent land and build a bigger house. But when it's only me who has the whole work with it, then it's too exhausting. And I'm not sure, if there are any more interested pledges!? And it's a question of money too. - Well, yes... if Rammy and me as group-owners rent land together, it would be okay. But think of all the nice stuff we could buy for that money instead!!!

Well, just wanted to tell you: I don't know how to go on with the fraternity.

The Pledges

Yes, you did read right: I wrote "two pledges". ~> Remember: We degraded Jeremy from owner to pledgemaster. But he still acted strange and abused his power. So, after several discussions and attempts to talk to him, last week we finally degraded him to pledge. And I have the certain feeling, he goes better with it!
(On the pic you see him playing piano four-handed with me. I didn't know he's a piano-player too...)
He acts fine now - most of the time. But he still thinks only of spanking, spanking and - oh yes! - spanking. - Well, spanking is fine and nice, but it's not everything in the world. And it isn't the only content matter of the fratgroup. The group is also about dominance and submission, caring, brotherhood and fun. I hope he will understand it one day...

Our other Pledge - Andrej - is a wonderful boy. He's so good at RP! (Here you see him sitting on one of the cushions I bought for the pledges. Doesn't he look nice?)
The only problem is: He's very often on stand-by duty. That means, we can't do all the things, we should do to him. He's got the paddling for three days (3x12) now coming PLUS two punishments. But he comes and goes, never has time. Okay, I understand it, but he won't be able to observe the pledge-rules...

You see: Future of the fraternity is in the dark! We got one pledge who has to get used to the fact, that he lost his authority, and a second pledge, who's not able to meet the requirements for a 24/7 - pledgehood. Maybe Rammy and I should just leave it and save the time and money for our personal joy?

XCited

Speaking of "personal joy"... I'm Xcited all over now! That means: I was shopping at the XCite-store. I bought a neck, nipples, clamps, lips, a gag, some combos and tools, and Rammy bought me a slave-collar.
We had lot's of fun with it. Rammy and I like to roleplay that master-slave-relationship sometimes. - But we both are aware that it's only a game. We are brothers, friends, pals though... Well, most people we meet seem to think, we are a couple. Even Andrej said it yesterday. That's strange! We never saw it that way.
However, we played master & slave two days ago. I enjoyed it. He said, he would like to walk me around on the leash, but he couldn't handle the collar. Hope he will learn soon, so we can go out. I'd like to!
(Hm, I'm not sure, if I should have written this, cause my pledges will read it. And maybe I'll loose some authority, if they come to know about their pledgemaster submitting?)

Femdom

Talking about submission... - Rammy and me are still looking for nice femdoms. I've been to the Queendom of Buccinaea (is that the right name?) several times. I got a new hairstyle. And I bought a nice Gor-male-slave-silk. I like it very much! Rammy likes it too, but Jeremy didn't. I showed it to Andrej yesterday, but I'm not sure, what he thinks about it.

Well, I don't know how to behave at that Queendom. And I don't know if the mistresses are even interested in me. Maybe they don't know how to handle a gay boy? And I have the impression, it's more about ridiculous humiliating games like making men to sissy-boys and stuff like that. I don't think I like that. Submission is one thing, but losing your personality is another!

Roleplay (RP)

I'm getting more and more used to that roleplaying. I like it, even if it's complicated and confusing (to say "no!" an mean "yes!") sometimes. I think I'm not too bad at it. I would be better if it was in German. Cause of my limited vocabulary I have some difficulties. You should be spontanous, but you can't be spontanous if it takes too long to build a sentence. Well, I'm making progress in my foreign languages, I guess...

What else?

Well, I think that's it. Anything else? I've been parachuting again. With Jeremiah first, then with Rammy. Yesterday Rammy and I took Andrej for a short flight. Two days ago I flew with Rammy up to 5.000 meters! Just for fun I disguised as an angel and flew through the dark starry sky. Was lot's of fun!

Yesterday we visited Andrej in his new condo. Very nice and cosy there! We three spent a lot of time talking. (Hm, well... he had no time for pledging, but time for talking? I have to think about that...) I found out that he's friend of one of my favorite comic-artists: Joe Phillips. Wow!

After he and Rammy went home, I strolled around a little. And I found a big Japanese school near to the apartment-house. But it seems it's not ready. Too bad! Could become a nice place there...

Okay, that's it for today. I hope I didn't forget anything!? You know there happens a lot in two weeks...