Tuesday, July 6, 2010

the renovation of Tidra

*hehe* I like this pic with the surprised look. Yeah, still busy building, though I don't progress as much as I was used to. Maybe because I'm getting tired of building. For a while I enjoyed it, but I really could use a break and get some distraction. There's a lot of detail-work which I don't like as you are busy for hours and don't see much result.

And these days I wonder more and more for what or whom I'm working my ass off at all? Haven't seen my hubbie for 5 weeks now. My lil devil only once for a few hours last week. I'm not sure, if the relationships will continue as I feel pretty much just left alone with the work, the responsibility and the financial burden. As the lil devil rented the full SIM without asking Kenshi or me beforehand, I had my doubts. Of course it is fine to have 15.000 prims available to build, but I'm too much of a rationalist. I had concerns according the costs of the full SIM, the lots of work for the renovation, the administration and the question how to bring people in to RP and possibly joining the group. But I was told, that I don't have to worry about any of these questions and foretold a big future of Tidra.

Well, and then... I was left alone. I'm working for more then two months now. Building the skybox first for our privacy, then the preparations for the wedding, then the renovation of Tidra. At least the island is almost ready and it's pretty, I think. But I don't know what it's good for. I feel all my doubts and concernes confirmed.  Maybe too much of a pessimist? But I paid 4 times as much as I said I could contribute (struggling with financial problems in RL anyways), not to mention the zillions of Lindens I spent for  buying new stuff.  At least I'm glad about our tenant Teleny who rented some of the prims and built a nice place in the skybox. Thank you for your support, dear! But all the other doubts too - like building alone  for months now (though I prefer to do my stuff undistracted and not doing compromises). Not to mention the missing RP; I do not have time for it and for "recruiting" or anything else.

So, yes, I'm a bit frustrated and cannot really enjoy what I created. The future of Tidra is very dark :(


Teleny Macarthur said...

I feel like I've run out on you too, dear friend.... my RL has been hectic with the local festival and the job search as well, plus Mom's health has slipped a bit with the heat. I know these are valid things, but I need to find some time to touch base inworld with you. Perhaps we can center each other emotionally again. Sometimes, a good conversation with a good friend can do that best. Love you, my friend, and I'll try to catch you online this evening, if I can find the time! *hugs*

Franziskus said...

Hi, sweets! Nah, don't worry. I know you're busy RL. But I guess, you're also too much playing that wizard-game at FB? *giggle*

Teleny Macarthur said...

Guilty as charged! LOL! I do that when I get down off the ladder a bit... but I AM pleased with the way the front of the house is looking, and it's good practice (to actually get off my butt and DO something!) for if/when I find a job! LOL!!!