getting better

Was getting a little better yesterday. Logged in late, just had five minutes to get dressed for my job at Spiritz. But I only "worked" for 5 minutes, then I asked Kiefer if I could go. I was so not in the mood to entertain after the night before. And there were enuff other dancers.

So I met my brother Rammy for a while. We talked and strolled around and played "burglar"... Well, we didn't really steal anything. *hehe* I just told him, that I will delete the frathouse soon and I want a Toscanian villa and I showed him the villa of Quags friend. But I never feel good to intrude into others homes, although Q. said, I could; it's no problem. The villa is really nice. But I'd need more rooms. Bedroom for me, for Douggie, for Rammy, guest-room etc. - However, I like especially the garden. So quiet and relaxing... Then I showed him the rocks in the ocean with the wonderful waves, which JC showed me a while ago. I want those waves in the new parcel. Should spend more time at those quiet, relaxing places; not always hunting from one dancefloor to the other.

However, I had to leave Rammy for a staff-meeting of Spiritz. And there Kiefer told us, that he gives up Spiritz. We were all very sad. Never earned much money there, but I liked the co-dancers and we always had fun there. I offered to pay half of the rent (Is lower then the rent of the frathouse *lol*), but Kiefers decision was fixed. Well, at least I will have more time for myself now. And I got to know Kiefs bro Rhy, who's as sexy as Kief himself. *sigh* So many nice and hot kittehs out there...

Oh my, it was a night full of IMs again. - Some good, some bad. Imur IMd me and apologized for kidding around with the cheap-thingens. And we were okis then. Tiger can't be angry for too long.

Somewhere in between I showed a new pledge the frathouse. And got a little sad, as I recognized how much work I had to build all that and that it was really good. And now I'm insecure, if I really should give it up. *sigh*

And while showing him the frathouse, my ex-hubbie signed in. What a surprise! After almost two months. But the same moment he logged in he disappeared from my friendslist. I called him and he said, his whole friendslist suddenly was empty. Strange things happening at SL these days! (THESE days?!?) However, we spoke about two sentences and he was already mad at me that I didn't wait for him. Jesus Christ! Things between us weren't good anyways those days and then he disappeared without a word for two months and then I should feel bad, that I didn't wait for him to come back? Did I already mention, that I somehow attract weirdos? Well, he took me of his friendslist again and I should just stop thinking about it. Period.

Well, after all the IMs (had to organize another dancer for Dom's) I just had 5 minutes to visit Lenny somewhere dancing around. Then hunting over to Domineck's. DJ Dafydd was spinning the tunes and we had some fun. Tree came and Imur and Rickie and Lenny and Kyne - and Zak was dancing with me anyways - so we had a good time. Place is becoming really good now.
And uhmmmm... I shared the 1st prize of the contest with Rickie. Maybe I shouldn't have voted for him? *hehe* Nah, is really good to share, and tips were okis anyway. I have some money left and rent is paid for 6 weeks.... So I think, I'll go shopping at Sine soon...

So, the night ended with Q. and Kyne and JC dancing at gay pride. Q. brought me to bed (way toooo late again) and I was in a better mood then night before but tired the same. Thought a lot about relationships and commitments, about the inner fight of the urge belonging to (the) one special person and the urge to get closer to many other persons. Beside my special someone there are so many people I love out there which I want to spend more time with and many more I want to come closer...